Hiding Behind a Mask

There are many times when people are afraid that they’ll come off needy or clingy.  They are afraid that if they share what is going on inside their heads, people will judge them.  I don’t know how many times I’ve had this happen to me.  Social anxiety is something that not too many people talk about.  And that’s not because people are afraid of what others will say.  It’s because most people don’t think that mental health is a real significant issue.  It’s not just going on in teens or millennials.  It’s all around.  We just turn a blind eye to it.  There are people who have fought for this country and struggle with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and don’t know who to talk to or how to talk about it.  There are so many people that suffer in silence and don’t know how to overcome these issues going on inside their heads.  So, what do they do?  They hide behind a mask.  This mask isn’t some Halloween mask.  It is so much more than that.  This mask is a metaphor sort of speak.  It’s whenever someone is really struggling with an issue or multiple issues.  Be that issues with home, work, school, or whatever.  They hide behind a mask.  Most of the time this mask is smiles and the person seems like they’re okay.  But deep down inside them they are really struggling.  Depression, anxiety, and panic attacks are not signs of weakness.  They are signs of trying to remain strong for far too long.  Following the death of Robin Williams, people started to take mental health more seriously.  They are seeking help and awareness.  Those who have been through it are trying to help those going through it.  Given that Robin Williams was considered the great clown, even he couldn’t overcome serious issues going on inside.  He hid behind a mask of laughter and comedy.  He was an idol to millions, including me, and when he ended his life it was as if the entire world stopped and cried together.  Mental health is a serious issue and should be addressed more.  Then there are the emotional masks, the masks we hide behind because of fear. For example, if we are insecure, we might hide behind the mask of name-dropping. If we are unsure of our power, we can hide behind mask of being a bully. If we don’t think the world loves us, we can hide behind mask of anger. We mask the debt we’ve incurred to pay for lifestyles we can’t afford; we pretend things are fine at work, when our jobs are on the line; we pretend things are okay in our marriages when there is distance.  One of our greatest fears is that if we show our true selves, the world will say, “Oh, it’s just you.” But being just you is actually the best and most perfect thing you could ever be. As Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself; everyone else is taken.” Or if you are interested in the spiritual perspective, the psalmist wrote, “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made”.  There are three practical reasons why we should shed our masks. The first is to live into our potential. We have to bring all of who we are to what we do. There are numerous people who have our same skillsets, or maybe an even better one. But none of these people bring the same personality, creativity, and spirit to the job that you do. That’s something they can’t match. The irony is that we often mask that part of ourselves at work and lose our greatest potential.  The second reason is relief. It is exhausting to live an inauthentic life. You put on a mask or two or ten, then take a few off, then put a couple more on: It’s exhausting! Worst of all, you start forgetting who you really are. As comedian and actress Fanny Brice explained, “Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be because sooner or later, if you are posing, you will forget the pose, and then, where are you?”